Tornado Tips You Can't get from Ken Siemek

The Midwest has been hit hard with tornadic weather the past three weeks in a row. Here's a picture my mom sent me of last week's storm moving into Omaha:


Awhile back, I ran across a list of tornado tips my dad and I, along with my friend, Monica, came up with in 1989 during a tornado warning. They're on the first and only used page of a notebook labeled "science":

my tips:

1. Go rent a video camera.
2. Take a walk.
3. Call the tv station and complain about the programming.
4. If things look really bad, go to the farthest video store and rent all those tapes you haven't seen yet. (ha! how dated is that? Renting videos back then was a novelty to us.)
5. Whatever you do, don't listen to the weatherman.
6. Stay in your basement a half hour less than what the weatherman says.

and from my dad:

-climb on top of your roof for a better look
-If you don't hear sirens honk your car horn until the battery runs down. (comment from Monica: explodingly gnarly idea!!)
-calmly make a trip to Bakers for emergency supplies (our Bakers at 72nd and Blondo is now closed-it makes me sad)
-call Aunty Emm

and from Monica, who I think added these tips the following day at school:

-order out 4 pizza.
-Invite your friends over and sit on the front porch eating triscuits and cheese spread and when you're done, go to the disco. And then to the dentist!

and one update from my sister from this past weekend:
-continue waiting tables at M's because no one told you there was a tornado warning.